National Treasure: Book of Secrets

Most people don't even question when I see a movie like National Treasure: Book of Secrets. Familiar choruses of "why?" or "what were you thinking" have long fallen silent and have been replaced by quiet hanging of heads. The sad acceptance that I'm going to live up to my self applied epithet and see a lot of movies that you can pretty much guarantee aren't worth seeing once you see the trailer or at times hear the announcement of the film.

National Treasure was a disaster of an action film and sad to say a masterstroke of the Jerry Bruckheimer promotion/production machine. Why waste any time on plot or character development when you can just overload your audience with huge set pieces, absolutely ludicrous plot developments and general narrative chaos with horrible overacting? Why indeed. And yet there has been a sequel to that cinematic mess. But believe me, the fact that I saw the film, isn't even the saddest part of this story.

You see, I'm not in my normal haunt this holiday. I'm over a thousand miles away in my parent's house. I have no car and am currently in a town that has no real public transportation to speak of and a general layout that demands an automated vehicle of some sort. So imagine me essentially trapped in this house with literally nothing on tv to entertain me. So yeah I went out to a movie. Which meant I had to walk to the nearest theater to see it. It isn't a very long walk to be sure...but oh yeah it was during a snow storm. Yeah, I walked about half a mile through blowing winds, falling snow and freezing temperatures all so I could see a movie I was seeing out of shear boredom.

National Treasure: Book of Secrets is as ridiculous of a movie as you could expect from a sequel. We once again follow Ben Gates as he sets off on another treasure hunt that will lead us through major historical sites filling us in on trivial history that isn't even interesting enough for me to care if its actually true. Ben is joined by the whole gang from last time. The villain this time is an overacting Ed Harris.

Sad as all this is, I was most saddened by Helen Mirren apparently deciding to make a paycheck movie. Now I'm sure this film was made before Ms. Mirren won her Academy Award but there should be some escape clause in actor contracts that permit Academy Award members to prevent the release of embarrassing films or at least in this day of digital magic be removed digitally from the film. And watching the masterful actress utter ridiculous lines and crawl around in the dirt is just painful to watch. I'd also make comment for character actor Bruce Greenwood (fairing much better in I'm Not There).

So was this awful movie worth my snow filled journey? I think that's what we call a rhetorical question. Even as I set out that afternoon through the blowing snow, I knew I was doing something completely idiotic and that I would hate the movie. On the bright side, I've got a story that makes me look like an idiot and I'm on film closer to 100 in theater for the year. (This made 82, for the record).